Saturday, August 04, 2007
pressured
Get really pressured these few days because of my next interview, alot of people are supporting me and wish that I will get out from my current line as a sales...friends, family, love ones.....seems like my whole emotion is not stable at all....people always ask me why I look so pressure and so down.....never see me in smiling face these few weeks....although yes..still in a very entertaining smile....
I just felt that ....I can't fail....if I fail seems like I will lost few things.....looks like the end of the world...but is not....I know there is alot of opportunity outside, but how many good chance can I get? I really can't afford to fail....sigh.....
My close friends even asked me...said that I did changed on how I've been judge and see things even how I've react....compared to last time...but I just felt that I'm still not satisfy of myself until the level that I really expected, it's very difficult and tiring...really....but is for my own good....nobody knows....sometimes I even break into tears middle of the nite...disappointed of myself, trying to re-analyze again how to do more better....sometimes my boss asked me, why my face looks "green" and my lips so "white"... I forget to take care of my health....when I'm headache I will always take panadol activ fast to cure my headache....bought some backup and put it in my car...although I know is bad for health to cure it this way....This is life....we have to face it......
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